Two weeks ago there was a bat mitzvah at the synagogue. Behind me was sitting a teenage girl who was by herself. I started talking to her. She went to Buchholz and was on the soccer team with the bat mitzvah girl. I introduced her to my nephew and they already knew each, at least from sight. They were both in the band.

Most people went in to lunch, but my sister and nephew were leaving. My sister said there were too many people she did not know. I told her Josh needed to go talk to that girl because she did not know anyone else, but they left anyway.

Those kind of opportunities do not happen every day. A cute girl from your High School, unescorted in your synagogue, in the band, on the girls soccer team, not knowing anyone and waiting for someone to talk to her. If only we knew then ...

Soon after that, on the Rikud (Israeli Dance) list, a woman complained she went to a group in a city she was visiting and nobody spoke to her.

Reminded me of a time at the JCC in Boca in Ira Weisburd's group. After playing basketball, I got to dancing late. I asked my cousin, "Who is the new guy?"

She said, "I don't know. I was going to meet him at the end."

I said to her, "That's not nice. That means he spends the whole evening not knowing anybody and feels out of place. You are supposed to introduce yourself right away, so he feels welcome."

At another group we used to go to, we used to joke that the oldtimers would not talk to you until you had been there for two years, because they did not know if you were coming back.