On the English Country Dance web page they had a link to All You Ever Need to Know About Relationships Can be Learned in a Dance Class.

If only.

Good advice for your superficial cases, which many dance relationships are, but some cases are more difficult.

A more realistic title is "More Than You Will Ever Want to Know About Relationships, You Will Learn In a Dance Class".

Karen told me she had a falling out with her friend David. Now he avoids her, so she avoids him. I find myself unable to resolve a similar situation.

I have two younger sisters and a mother. I hardly paid them any attention except to torment them. My mother said I was a collicky bady. She said I came out screaming and did not stop for a year. When my sister was born, I pushed her bassinet down the stairs. I was literally born with an instinct for upsetting women, so I need a reliable means of resolving conflict.

Luckily, I come from a long family of fighters. If something bothers us, we fight. When my sister tried to run away from an argument, my dad yelled at her, "Come back here and fight like a man."

My sister was complaining to my mom about her husband and my mother told her to fight with him. She also told her to shtupt him. They have a good relationship, so it seems to work.

I had a girlfriend whose method of conflict resolution was the silent treatment. She broke up with me four times and would never tell me why. I listened to a book on tape "How to Deal with Difficult People." The author talked about 12 types, like the Liar, the Procastinator, the Verbal Abuser, the Chamelon, and he had techniques for dealing with them all, except one. The most difficult type he said was the Clam, which is the person that will not talk with you. He said there is nothing you can do with a Clam. His advice was to give up.

After one of the break ups, Ifhat, a good friend of mine got mad at me, but she said, "We have been friends a long time. I don't want there to be bad feelings between us." I had forgotten how normal people behave.

One day I got a call from Eti. She said, "Come pick me up." I went over to her brother's house and she was standing outside with her suitcases. She had a fight with her sister-in-law. She said, "I am going back to Israel." I asked her if she told them she was leaving. She said, "I left a note." I told her not to be so hasty and she could stay in my extra bedroom.

We had some big fights. If something bothered her, she could not hold it in for two minutes. You have to love that. She had five brothers who she was close too, but when her baby was born, she gave him to me to hold him at the bris. I would have preferred a seat further from the action.

I told Karen to go talk to David and make up.

I do not know if the author was right about dealing with a Clam. Nothing I have ever tried worked. Maybe writing an article will.