I had a big fight with one of my dance teachers.

In my family, growing up, we fought so much that we had a name for the real doozies, "Knock Down Drag Out Fights".

My parents were together 50 years. One of their rules was to present a united front. They never fought in front of the kids.

When I was little, I asked my mother if I could do something and she said no, so I asked my father and he said yes. Sometime later my dad came up to me, furious and said, "Are you trying to get me divorced? If either one of us says no, it is no."

If you are not fighting, you do not have a close relationship. Everyone has feelings of frustration that turn into anger and resentment. They have to come out. If you keep them in, you start planning the demise of your partner, and like my cousin's wife of 15 years, one day say out of the blue, "I want a divorce."

In "Life as We Know It", after the two stars of the movie have a Knock Down Drag Out Fight in front of all their friends, Josh Lucas says to Katherine Heigl, "If my wife and I fought like that, we would still be married."

I was getting annoyed in this dance class I was going to, when the teacher asked for feedback. I answered her email with a short suggestion. She wrote me back asking for details, saying she could not make changes unless she knew specifically what they should be. I wrote her a long email back going into a lot of details.

She wrote me back, insulted and furious, "You go too far!".

This fight did not reach the satisfying proportions of a Knock Down Drag Out Fight, but I did almost get kicked out class.

There is only one important thing you need to do in a Knock Down Drag Out Fight, finish it.

My first girlfriend had a mouth on her. She used to start up with me on everything. We had a lot of fights. She used to call me a bulldog, because she said I would not let anything go if it was bothering me. She was as challenging and as much fun as anyone I have known.

Fights clear the air. They get rid of resentment, restore healthy feelings and make relationships stronger. The person you fought with knows you care enough to stick around and fight.

My dance teacher put my suggestions into practice and the next class was as good as any we have had, if I do say so myself, but more importantly, we have a stronger relationship for having fought.

The only problem with fighting is you have to have a willing partner. It only takes one person to ruin a relationship, but it takes two to fight.

When I think of the people I have known and the conflicts we have had, I cannot think of one fight I wish we did not have, but I can think of many fights I wish we did have.